An 11th inning bases-loaded walk to Willy Taveras forced in the winning run to give Colorado a 3-2 victory over the Diamondbacks Friday night, putting the Rockies up two games to none in the best-of-seven series. The win was Colorado’s 19th in the last 20 games and they are now two wins away from their first ever National League pennant and World Series appearance.

In this era of parity in professional sports, hot streaks like the one the Rockies currently enjoy are almost unheard of, especially considering that it extends into the postseason against supposedly stiff competition. At this point it seems like they could insert nine random Little Leaguers from the stands into their starting lineup, give them team tequila shots in between innings, and still come out on top. Before you tell me this this is a ridiculous idea and I should probably go back to taking my court-ordered medication, let me first state that they would drink Patrón, not that cheap Pepe Lopez crap. Cheap tequila can upset young stomachs, and that wouldn’t be very responsible at all, would it?

In fact, I’ll bet you didn’t know that this very stunt was tried several years ago by a small minor league team in South Carolina, with disastrous results. By the third inning the nine- and ten-year-olds were puking in the bullpen and sexually assaulting the opposing mascot; however, the game was declared a semi-success due to the surprisingly positive fan response to a seventh inning brawl. In case you were wondering, drunk prepubescent boys fight dirty and are incredibly resistant to direct kicks in the groin because their balls haven’t dropped yet.* Although, if you were actually wondering that, you have bigger problems than I can help you with, my friend.

*I know, because I’m a real live doctor. Not really a doctor like Dr. Ruth, but more of a doctor like Dr. Pepper. And by that, I mean I’m delicious and would go well with a Thickburger**.

**P.S. No fat chicks